on failure and procrastination

so i fucked up nablopomo 2 years in a row. the first time it was because i was busy getting laid after a nice dinner and some scotch; the second time we moved and had no internets for 5 days, and i'd had a sufficient enough amount of beer on top of exhaustion that i forgot i had a cell phone capable of texting my blog. i certainly feel the former reason was a worthier cause, but the latter is quite justifiable. maybe three's the charm; we'll give this a go next year. and if i drink too much wine and forget to post, maybe i'll need to recognize a pattern of behavior and join AA.

i haven't posted since "the failure" on the 14th because of my chagrin, and the boring sameness of each day spent avoiding all the things you should be doing - work, unpacking, the gym - and instead, doing something else that you can't remember at the end of the day. i realize that sounds like i've been hitting the hookah and watching talk shows - man, i wish. we've hit up ikea and survived; we've built a bed and frame, and i've spent a remarkable amount of time testing it. my boss has systematically evaded every scheduled meeting or opportunity to complete his half of the paper we're writing, to the point where i wish i hadn't stressed all last weekend about rushing to get my half done (he still hasn't even read it, much less edited it). it's way past deadline and i think i'll find that the past 2 months of reading and 3 weeks of writing will wind up in the toilet when it's not submitted in time. my reaction to this should illustrate what kind of person i am. i could have offered to help with the remainder to ensure that our paper gets out on time. but what would that get me? the reputation for someone who will roll over and take it when someone else slacks off. so i could be at work, writing away on the sections i said i wouldn't do. but instead, i slept till 11 and now i'm going to bake some pies.