devo!!!!

so today i wore exactly this:




and it was awesome. i was the first volunteer to be taped into my suit and it was hard work to move around and decontaminate yourself in it. my partner freaked out waiting to attach the regulator to his mask and we had to tear him out.

but sabominator was wicked chill the whole time.

of gas and chips (and not what you think i mean by that - flatulence-free post)

today i discovered my low fuel light.

i'm not like my mom; i don't fill up at a hair under half a tank, just in case the terrorists strike or anything. i like to hit big E first, but i've never been quite low enough, and always stressed that i didn't have a low level light. yeah i found a way to stress about that. but it's there, and now i can push the limits a little more. nothing like growing as a person.

speaking of growing, i think my personal exposure limit to sunchips is about infinity. i can eat these little bastards for 3 meals a day. my menstrual gnomes hold my ovaries captive, and french onion sunchips are the ransom. works every time.

my first day of hazardous spill response training was cool. i learned all about the NFPA diamonds and DOT codes for haz material transport. and beyond that, what kinds of noxious gas can be formed by mixture with water. and the appropriate evacuation radii for such occurences. so i can clean up tanker spills on I-495 now. sweet. tomorrow i get to wear an SCBA. sexy.

kz might wish he had an SCBA later on, when he has to deal with the aftermath of my sunchips. ha! i lied, totally flatulence.

OMG friday

i could not be happier that this week is over.

last night i dreamt that i was at my dartmouth interview, and i sweated so much that all my mascara ran, and when i went to the bathroom i saw my whole face was busted, and i tried to wash it all off, and it just made my entire visage grey and streaky. and i took so long trying to clean up that the head of the department had another meeting and i didn't get to talk to him. but then they accepted me anyway.

hmm.

then i was really wrapped up this morning in feeling bad for myself and my sore throat, and obsessing over why i went up 0.5 lbs in the last week, and then kz began to talk about dinner plans and maybe going out if i wasn't feeling sick later today, which i think was a gentle reminder.

we know how sabominator is with gentle anything. he had to be like, uh, yeah, going out cause it's, ahem, my birthday.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HONEYBEARZ!!!!

so i did it again this year. but i swear i would have remembered when i got to work and found out what day it was. really.

instead of using new year's as an excuse to resolve to get less fat, i should have resolved to be less self-centered. i think losing weight is easier though.

meh

i know i have a cold when hunter's seriously sharp cheddar tastes like frigging monterey jack, and i walk around the house alone with a forlorn expression while i hum a subconscious cheese dirge.

snow day!

i called out today due to massive amounts of winter coating the 495 corridor.
while i was semi-productive in that i got a pap smear (ick), bought interview clothes and groceries, i did nothing else the rest of the day. those who know me can appreciate how much willpower that took. no gym, no laundry, no sorting of my closet vomit that plagues the bedroom. just tv, sweet tv.

but i needed some downtime after the bulk of yesterday spent working outside (cold? what cold) on mein auto. fresh oil, new plugs - cut through the snow like butter, and i laughed at every stuck pickup and skidding state cruiser on the way to town today.

added to resume

it must be my mad nasal vomiting skillz, cause i just got an interview with tufts, too.

i do these things in public and word gets out. for real.

bleh

so after a few days off during the worst part of my cold, i went back to the gym with intentions to do it up full-force. right in the middle of a glute exercise where i was leaning over, i got one of those sneak-attack burps that makes you be like, did i just do that? really? it must have slipped out, cause i didn't feel it coming.

only this one had a nice hefty pocket of vomit on top of it, and i had my mouth shut tight while lifting. so it all came out my nose.

that's hot.

horray!

so now, not only was i invited to the umass med open house, i also have an interview at dartmouth med.

looks like little sabominator may just get into grad school, after all!

i know, nearly everyone (ok i lied, everyone) has been telling me to pull my head out of my ass and stop worrying, that i have nothing to fear. well, you were right, but...

so of course, now sabominator can relax by the pool and drink pina coladas, right? nope. now i'm stressing about whether or not i applied to the right departments based on faculty research areas of interest, how well my technical skills would mesh with current departmental foci, etcetera...what can i say, i am a walking turd of stress.

without stress, there is no progress; without progress, the sabominator cannot be placated.

well i can't ever be satisfied anyway. but i am approaching "pleased, yet freaking out" on the sab-o-meter. i think it's as good as it gets.

how about that

today i realized two things.

1) i am a freak. i felt sick last night and this morning, but didn't want to stay home from work. why? i have oodles of sick time since it's a new year. because i had THINGS i wanted to do at work. a report i was looking forward to writing (?!?), data i was looking forward to presenting (?!?) and an assay i wanted to run over the weekend. is this what decaf does for you? i don't think so, cause i had excedrin on an empty stomach at 10am after 5 days of no coffee. best legal high ever. next best was taking the pike instead of rt 9 and shaving 15 min off my morning drive.

2) this is the first weekend that i don't have to feel guilty for not studying for the GRE or not finishing an online application. now i can just feel guilty that i live in a sty. i can watch movies, mentally unfettered.

oink.

oops

so i finally fixed that pesky comment problem (e.g., tons of people left me comments and none got published. guess i was supposed to approve them. who knew?) i'm happy about it cause i thought, all of a sudden, my readership went to zip. not that it's that large anyway. so comment away!!

not much new. still basking in the engagement afterglow. just heard that i got "selected" to go to a umass med open house, which i hope bodes well for the rest of the admission process. added UNH as a last minute school to my list. all apps are out the door, checks are still being debited from my forlorn checking account...also that blue binder some may have seen me toting around like a security blanket for 3 months, the one that's organized, file-tabbed, color-coded with every mail confirmation receipt and application, essay, or resume draft, well it's finally on the shelf. thank god.

but it's thursday, i gotta write my monthly report, i'm on day 4 of decaf-only, and i need to poop. cheers!

whoa!

just an FYI: before you go desinging me invitations, sending me fabric swatches, drafting seating charts, or thinking of hip registries, step back for a moment and reassess:

1) this is totally not happening until mid to late 2007 *at the earliest*
2) i'm not having a "real wedding," just a party on the beach with some bums and beer. no dress, no bridal party, no place cards.
3) if i end up feeling stressed out about this at all or kz and i utter a single angry word to each other as a result of planning, we're totally eloping.

phew. now we can all put our planners away and ring in the new year.

i'm really getting used to having this weight on my left finger. it's a weird transition if you don't really wear jewelry.

i like it :)

surprise!!!

kz just proposed, so we're engaged now :)
time to go celebrate!
he picked this out himself - it's amazing! who ever thought i would be such a chick: